Saturday, August 22, 2015

Are you okay?

Are you okay?

It's fine if you're not.

Really, it's fine. 

Don't worry about me, or about what I'll think of you.

I understand you, somehow. 

If you think you're weak, well, I can't say you're wrong.
We have moments of weakness, even the bravest soldier does.

What matters is that you're trying, trying to make things go well for you, 
to be happy, to be grateful, to be busy, to be, yeah, okay.

But of course, we can get tired from trying. 

When good things haven't pervaded your insides yet, it won't be easy.

It won't be natural. Not yet.

And it will always sap out your energy.

It does, for now.

So I tell you again. 

It's fine if you're not feeling positive today, or this minute, or this hour.

Probably it's about time that you rest, that you stop trying for a while. 

Feel the pain, or loneliness, or yearning
or whatever it is that's leaving your equilibrium askew. 

Allow me to sit with you while you let the feeling sink into you again,
back around your system.

Feel it. 

Bask in its exotic beauty, for there's beauty even in disarray.

Dwell on it until you have enough.

Then release that scream that's long been pent-up in you. 

Open yourself up to that steam that's been billowing in your chest. 

Let out the words you've so long forgotten
but have buried at the back of your head.

Free yourself, my friend.

Empty yourself of these destructible things you don't deserve.

Let it all out.

You'll know when you're done.

You'll know it when you're already empty enough to receive good things again.

You'll know it when you're ready to try again,
to face another day, to fight again.

You'll know it when you've loosened your grip
on the thorns that have been keeping you wounded.

By then, I'll be happy to ask you again,
 when I know you can already genuinely say,
you're okay.

Wednesday, August 12, 2015

You Have Wings

I realized, I have wings.

I wasn't aware until I was forced to spread them to save my life.

You opened the cage then I looked down. The ground seemed so far below me. I looked back at my place and stepped backward. I thought that if you wanted me free, it wasn't possible. I'd fall and die if I'd get out of my cage. I decided to stay for a while but not for so long.

Not long enough 'cause the moment you opened the door, you forgot about me. You stopped feeding me. You stopped giving me water to drink. You never visited me again for chitchats or quick tickles. You never even laid your eyes on me again. I became non-existent. Non-existent to your world, at least.

Because looking out, I could see a bigger world - the vast sky, steep mountains, blue ocean and wide terraces. I wondered, how much could it offer? I was thin and starving. I was thirsty. I was yearning. I still waited though. I waited until I turned skin and bones with scorched tongue and weak heart.

Then one day, I breathed deeply. I knew I deserved to live, to be cared for, to be happy. I looked at the sky. It was calm and radiant. I turned ahead of me, to the opened door. Hey, I was free. Rather, I could be free. What are the possibilities? So with renewed strength, I closed my eyes and bent my knees. Then like a springboard, I jumped out of the cage with all my might.

I jumped as high and far as I could, trusting that something from the huge world would catch me. But nothing did even brush my skin. I felt nothing. Not even a bump. I heard not even a thump. I opened my eyes.

I was on top of everything, almost touching the sky. I was free. Oh, I could fly!

I realized, I have wings.