That day your dream comes true

I've been longing for that day

when finally I'd get to be

where I know I should be

and do what my heart desires.

That day, I'd wake up in the morning

with a smile on my face and glitter on my eyes.

and with a thankful heart I'd say,

"My dream comes true today."

That day, I'd take a refreshing bath,

wear my best clothes and shoes,

fix my hair, put on my make-up,

all to bring my best self forward.

That day, I would pour forth

the wisdom and knowledge I acquired

over the years of my study,

and I'd do it all with enthusiasm.

That day, I'd spread love,

touch everyone and everything with love,

and leave love in everyone and everything

and still, love would be overpouring within.

That day, however, there could be suffering

or challenges, failure and pain.

My passion would be tested,

my strength and will would be put into the fire.

That day, I'd certainly go home,

hungry, exhausted, maxed out

but still, with a smile on my eyes and glitter on my eyes

and with a grateful heart, I'd say,

"Hey, my dream comes true today."

When things seem to not go your way...

In the last few months, I tried holding everything in my hands. I wanted to make sure that I was using my freedom enough to fulfill my deepest desires. I never dared to waste a single minute of each day. I woke up every morning, wrote my plans for the day, and followed them in every letter. I felt in total control, and thus in total responsibility of my future.

Little by little, I saw my career plans being torn away. I saw how my dreams seemed to become impossible. I held on even to the tiniest spark of hope left in me. I stumbled several times, got frustrated and disappointed, but stood up again.

I'm warning you reader, that this won't end like any other successful stories you may be expecting. Because until now, I can't say that I've already reached my dreams and accomplished my career goals. Worst is, I'm now already shambling to different directions, confused of where the right path is. However, if there's one thing worth telling and sharing about all this, that is - I have learned how to surrender.

I learned that surrendering isn't a sign of weakness, nor of defeat. I realized that it is fine to surrender when you know you've done all you can, and still couldn't win the battle. Moreover, the question of how you surrendered is another thing. Did you just lie yourself there in the battlefield and feigned death? Did you step backward, and just took some time to rest? Or did you press the SOS button, and let your hero win the battle for you?

I loosened my grip and surrendered everything to God. I realized that some things, especially those which I can't control, really do need divine intervention. I realized that there is a God who stays on my side - a God who is far wiser and stronger enough to win any battle; a God who loves me and cares for me than I to myself; a God who always, always has better plans. Now, everything feels lighter. And I appreciate my freedom more than ever.